nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize