If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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