Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
only you would photoshop your dick
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today