Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
