I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
you will always have a special place in my vag
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
