Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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