Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize