So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
It's just like the Real World with babies
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
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Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
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How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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