This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
