she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
