why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
