When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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