Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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