i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
