the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
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