She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
