I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
