just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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