To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
