boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
