well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
