good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
