People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
The beers last night were like the tears from god
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
