so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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