You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
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we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
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Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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