somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Your shirt... Was in my pants
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
