He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
God, I missed his penis.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
