oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Sorry my hands just texted you
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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