Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
well you can't waste a boner
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
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