Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
