i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
