I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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