Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
