I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Randomize
