If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
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