i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.