No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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