the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
