Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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