you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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