ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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