1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
