i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
no. you can't hotbox the world.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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