Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
