Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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