Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize