your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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