i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize