Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
i believe in u and ur pee
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
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