we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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