addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize